Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Marriage Tips: Breathe Your Way to a Happier Marriage.By Nancy Wasson

One way to increase your chances of enjoying a happy marriage is to remember to breathe deeply. Are you surprised by this recommendation? You’re probably not the only one.

The concept of deep breathing as a valuable tool in creating a satisfying marriage may sound strange at first, but that’s because most of us don’t give much thought to the subject of breathing. And breathing isn’t usually tied in with marital happiness unless someone cracks a joke about the “heavy breathing” associated with sex.

What are the benefits of deep breathing that spouses may want to consider? Here’s a partial list:

• prevents stress from building up,

• reduces tension that is already there,

• increases energy level,

• reduces insomnia and fatigue,

• reduces general anxiety,

• helps relaxation process,

• lowers blood pressure,

• helps mental alertness, and

• helps in control of emotions.

Just think—all of these benefits from just adding some breathing awareness and exercises to your day! No, this isn’t a magic cure-all that comes with a guarantee. But it’s free, it’s easy, it can be done anywhere, it requires no special equipment, and it’s safe—so why not experiment and see for yourself?

But what’s wrong with the way you’re breathing now, you might ask. If you’re a typical adult, you probably breathe most of the time using only your chest muscles, which fills only the top part of the lungs with each breath. This doesn’t allow you to take in sufficient oxygen or to eliminate sufficient carbon dioxide. Thus, your body becomes oxygen starved, and toxins build up.

When you’re under stress or feeling anxious, your heart rate goes up as you breathe faster and take shallow breaths. In contrast, when you slow down and breathe deeply instead of taking fast, shallow breaths, your heart doesn’t have to work as hard, and you are counteracting the effects of stress, tension, and anxiety.

And with that basic understanding, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to connect the dots between deep breathing and feeling better physically and emotionally and how this could affect a marriage relationship.

If you feel better physically, are more relaxed, less stressed and tense, are sleeping better, and are less anxious and fatigued, then you’re going to be more likely to have the energy and stamina to put more effort into your marriage relationship. You’ll also be more likely to be able to control your emotions better and less likely to “snap” over something minor. And you might be a lot more fun to be around!

Remember that old adage to “Take a deep breath and count to ten” when you’re angry? That’s still good advice. When you’re irritated, agitated, or angry with your spouse, stop and take several deep breaths before you respond and make things even worse.

If you still feel that your anger is escalating, say that you need to take a short break before continuing the conversation. Then, go into another room (if there’s no other place to retreat, go into the bathroom) and do several minutes of breathing exercises.

Likewise, when you’re feeling stressed and tense, stop and do some breathing exercises before the tension builds up and spills over into your marriage relationship. By using breathing awareness and techniques to relieve tension, you’ll be able to prevent many disagreements and arguments that occur when spouses are stressed. You might even find that remembering to breathe deeply during sex increases your pleasure.

Here are some simple breathing exercises you can work into your daily life to help you relax and cope better with stress and relationship challenges:

Exercise l: To experience the difference between chest breathing and deep belly breathing, place one hand on your chest and the other hand on your tummy. You will probably notice that the hand on your chest is moving with each breath.

Your goal is to reverse this and have the hand on your tummy move instead of the hand on your chest as you inhale and exhale. If it’s hard to experience this sitting down, you may wish to lie down on the floor where it can be easier to experience belly breathing initially.

Just observe your breathing as you take deep breaths and feel your belly rise with each inhalation. Do this for several minutes until your breathing slows down and you begin to feel more relaxed.

Exercise 2: Sit comfortably, close your eyes, and focus your attention on the two pauses that occur during the breathing process. The first is just after you inhale (right before you start to exhale) and the second is just after you exhale (right before you inhale again).

Don’t try to control your breathing; just focus on the two pauses, noticing how the breath pauses slightly each time. Just notice the two slight pauses as you breathe in and out. As you focus your attention on the two pauses, you’ll find that you are breathing more deeply and are getting more relaxed.

Take this mini-stress-relieving break twice a day and allow yourself at least five minutes of peaceful relaxation each time.

Exercise 3: Put one hand on your abdomen right below your navel. Inhale slowly and deeply through your nose. Imagine that you are blowing up a balloon as your lower abdomen starts filling up with air.

Count slowly to 3 as you inhale. You’ll notice that your hand is rising as your abdomen fills with air.

Pause and count to 2. Then exhale slowly through your nose to a count of 3. Imagine that all of the air is leaving the balloon. Repeat this several times.

Exercise 4: Sit comfortably, close your eyes, and take a deep breath as you count slowly to 4. Then hold your breath for a count of 4.

Next, exhale slowly to a count of 8, making your exhalation twice as long as your inhalation. You may want to put one hand on your abdomen to be sure you are breathing deeply from your belly. Repeat several times.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Good Marriage Advice Can Save Your Marriage! by Meredith Glee

The facts are true, good marriage advice can also be the source of your secrets to a happy marriage. By learning to adjust and make your marriage easier to cope with, you've managed to avoid a worse situation, and have learned a valuable secret.

By taking and applying some tips in the area of your marriage, you can stave off many problems, and relax many tense situations. The advice is meant to help you, but can only do so if you follow it. And there seems to be more of it available today than in any other decade.

By being a good listener, and being honest with yourself as well as your mate, you're on the road to learning some secrets to a happy marriage, and also learning how to implement good marriage advice into your own personal situation.

One of the so-called secrets (which really isn't a secret, it's just that couples many times don't do it), is to wait and discuss your problem after you've had time to calm down and your blood is no longer at a full boil.

Learning to dwell on the good things as opposed to the problems, many time problems can just dissipate and go away. But it takes an honest effort to hold on to the good, and let go of the unwanted and bad. Being armed with a few secrets to a happy marriage can come from good marriage advice from family and friends, just as easily as from a professional.

Good Marriage Advice Can Save Your Marriage! by Meredith Glee

The facts are true, good marriage advice can also be the source of your secrets to a happy marriage. By learning to adjust and make your marriage easier to cope with, you've managed to avoid a worse situation, and have learned a valuable secret.

By taking and applying some tips in the area of your marriage, you can stave off many problems, and relax many tense situations. The advice is meant to help you, but can only do so if you follow it. And there seems to be more of it available today than in any other decade.

By being a good listener, and being honest with yourself as well as your mate, you're on the road to learning some secrets to a happy marriage, and also learning how to implement good marriage advice into your own personal situation.

One of the so-called secrets (which really isn't a secret, it's just that couples many times don't do it), is to wait and discuss your problem after you've had time to calm down and your blood is no longer at a full boil.

Learning to dwell on the good things as opposed to the problems, many time problems can just dissipate and go away. But it takes an honest effort to hold on to the good, and let go of the unwanted and bad. Being armed with a few secrets to a happy marriage can come from good marriage advice from family and friends, just as easily as from a professional.

Stop Your Divorce - Save Your Marriage by Jake Jafims

Don't give up too soon! Sometimes it seems easier to get a divorce than to work to keep your marriage alive. This mindset is at the root of many divorces. The truth is much different. As you will read later in this article, the reality of divorce is much different then you may imagine. If you and your partner are willing to learn and work to save your marriage, there is a good chance that it can be saved.

There are some very good reasons saving your marriage as well. Many people considering a divorce imagine that happiness lies on the other side of the fence. Research however suggests that this isn't true. A survey of people who have gone through divorce showed that in general they weren't happier.

Getting a divorce may be jumping the gun. A recent study showed that 2/3 of people who were unhappy in their marriage and on the verge of divorce said that they were happy in their marriage five years later.

The majority of happily married couples have experienced extended periods of unhappiness. The key point is that it is important to be committed to your marriage. Don't throw away years of happiness in order to avoid short term problems. There are many ways to stop a divorce, there are a few tip to get you started.

1. Communication is key

I'm sure you've heard it before, but it's still true. You must communicate on a deep level with your partner regularly. "On a deep level" doesn't mean discussing who is going to pick up the kids from school or trying to remember when the oil was last changed in the car. Spend some time talking about your feelings about your relationship. Discuss the things that are important, not the trivial stuff life throws at us.

2. No Relationship Is Perfect

One of the hardest lessons I've ever learned is that when fantasy becomes reality, it's never quite as good as you imagined. When you are under a lot of stress at home, it is easy to slip into an imaginary world where everything is perfect. You imagine that being with a different partner would be perfect. Perfect relationship only exist in theory. Enjoy you fantasies but don't fall into the trap of believing that they are real.

3. Seek Help To Stop Divorce

You can stop your divorce if both of you are willing to make the effort. In addition to the desire to save your marriage, you may need some outside help. Help is available. Public libraries have lots of books on the subject of marriage advice. Many products are available online. If reading isn't your thing then you may prefer these products. Live one-on-one counseling is also available. Personal counseling can be expensive but sometimes it is the only method that works.

Remember that divorce has its repercussions as well as huge financial setbacks. But more importantly, it destroys a marriage and fully ends relationships. If there is till love in your marriage, then it's possible to stop your divorce.

A Happier, More Sexual Marriage; A Secret For Men by Calle Zorro

Hey guys, are you interested in a little secret that can really help your marriage be a happier, more sexual union?

I thought you might be...but first, I need to "prepare" you to receive this secret...

Men like things to be DIRECT. Men like it when there is a one-to-one correlation to what they want. If they want 'X', then they want to be able to DIRECTLY push the 'X' button and immediately have an 'X' pop out.

This is why men the world over...when it comes time for love-making...well, there isn't actually much love-making...because the guy is busy PUNCHING and GRINDING the 'X' button...or in this case, his wife's clitoris/vagina...trying to DIRECTLY start her sexual motor so that the "sexual pleasure" he wants can occur.

I'm still preparing you to receive the secret...

Mostly, women are NOT direct like men are. In general, women do NOT want to push the 'X' button and have an 'X' pop out. Instead, they want to push the 'X' button which will then open the door so that they can push the 'Y' button which then paves the way so they can push the 'Z' button...which then loops them around so they can start on the 'A' button...and EVENTUALLY get back to the original 'X' button and this time FINALLY, have an 'X' pop out.

Going back to the love-making scenario...guys are driving STRAIGHT for the orgasm...their woman wishes just for ONCE that they could take the "scenic tour"...but the guy's driving...and he usually gets straight to what he wants...and his woman is left unsatisfied...dreaming...wishing...for a man who was a real lover...

Which raises the question, "What kind of lover are you?"

Ok, I think you're finally ready to receive the secret...

The reason we went through this whole direct and indirect thing is because this secret is INDIRECT...but if applied, it WILL lead to a happier, more sexual marriage...

Here it is...

LET YOUR WOMAN DO THINGS HER WAY AND TRAIN YOUR WOMAN TO LET YOU DO THINGS YOUR WAY. And, where there's overlap, work out and negotiate a mutually acceptable compromise.

Now, at first, that might seem rather obvious and not all that much of a secret so let's explore the idea...

If he doesn't watch out, a Type-A man (driving, competitive, fast-paced, active, impatient, serious) who is married to a Type-B (laid-back, relaxed, slow-paced, easy-going, patient, non-competitive, fun-oriented) woman will be constantly driving his woman to do what he wants RIGHT NOW. He'll constantly be trying to place her in competitive situations. Because of how he is, he'll be constantly trying to "make" her be like him, do things like him, and do things the way he would do them. And of course, because of how she is, the woman is trying to get the man to do things HER way.

Similarly, if a extroverted woman is married to an introverted man, she'll be constantly trying to get her husband to be more outgoing...she'll be pushing him to relax and open up and have fun in the midst of a big crowd...to socialize like she does...and the whole time, he's getting more nervous, upset, and frustrated by the second...which is why he always puts up the blocks and resistances to going out and intermingling in the first place.

There are other contrasts I could make but you get the point...and you can plainly see that the result is constant conflict...the result is a not very happy and definitely not very sexual marriage.

But, when a man and woman DECIDE to LET their companion be themselves and do things in their own way and respect and appreciate their companion for who and what they are THEN a person INDIRECTLY paves the way for a far happier, way more sexual marriage relationship.

Do you now see how this really is an important secret to a happier, more sexual marriage relationship? I'll repeat it one more time...

"Let your woman do things her way and train your woman to let you do things your way. And, where there's overlap, work out and negotiate a mutually acceptable compromise."

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if authorship credit is given to Calle Zorro and a link to MoreSexForMen.com is included with it:

A Happier, More Sexual Marriage; A Secret For Men by Calle Zorro

Hey guys, are you interested in a little secret that can really help your marriage be a happier, more sexual union?

I thought you might be...but first, I need to "prepare" you to receive this secret...

Men like things to be DIRECT. Men like it when there is a one-to-one correlation to what they want. If they want 'X', then they want to be able to DIRECTLY push the 'X' button and immediately have an 'X' pop out.

This is why men the world over...when it comes time for love-making...well, there isn't actually much love-making...because the guy is busy PUNCHING and GRINDING the 'X' button...or in this case, his wife's clitoris/vagina...trying to DIRECTLY start her sexual motor so that the "sexual pleasure" he wants can occur.

I'm still preparing you to receive the secret...

Mostly, women are NOT direct like men are. In general, women do NOT want to push the 'X' button and have an 'X' pop out. Instead, they want to push the 'X' button which will then open the door so that they can push the 'Y' button which then paves the way so they can push the 'Z' button...which then loops them around so they can start on the 'A' button...and EVENTUALLY get back to the original 'X' button and this time FINALLY, have an 'X' pop out.

Going back to the love-making scenario...guys are driving STRAIGHT for the orgasm...their woman wishes just for ONCE that they could take the "scenic tour"...but the guy's driving...and he usually gets straight to what he wants...and his woman is left unsatisfied...dreaming...wishing...for a man who was a real lover...

Which raises the question, "What kind of lover are you?"

Ok, I think you're finally ready to receive the secret...

The reason we went through this whole direct and indirect thing is because this secret is INDIRECT...but if applied, it WILL lead to a happier, more sexual marriage...

Here it is...

LET YOUR WOMAN DO THINGS HER WAY AND TRAIN YOUR WOMAN TO LET YOU DO THINGS YOUR WAY. And, where there's overlap, work out and negotiate a mutually acceptable compromise.

Now, at first, that might seem rather obvious and not all that much of a secret so let's explore the idea...

If he doesn't watch out, a Type-A man (driving, competitive, fast-paced, active, impatient, serious) who is married to a Type-B (laid-back, relaxed, slow-paced, easy-going, patient, non-competitive, fun-oriented) woman will be constantly driving his woman to do what he wants RIGHT NOW. He'll constantly be trying to place her in competitive situations. Because of how he is, he'll be constantly trying to "make" her be like him, do things like him, and do things the way he would do them. And of course, because of how she is, the woman is trying to get the man to do things HER way.

Similarly, if a extroverted woman is married to an introverted man, she'll be constantly trying to get her husband to be more outgoing...she'll be pushing him to relax and open up and have fun in the midst of a big crowd...to socialize like she does...and the whole time, he's getting more nervous, upset, and frustrated by the second...which is why he always puts up the blocks and resistances to going out and intermingling in the first place.

There are other contrasts I could make but you get the point...and you can plainly see that the result is constant conflict...the result is a not very happy and definitely not very sexual marriage.

But, when a man and woman DECIDE to LET their companion be themselves and do things in their own way and respect and appreciate their companion for who and what they are THEN a person INDIRECTLY paves the way for a far happier, way more sexual marriage relationship.

Do you now see how this really is an important secret to a happier, more sexual marriage relationship? I'll repeat it one more time...

"Let your woman do things her way and train your woman to let you do things your way. And, where there's overlap, work out and negotiate a mutually acceptable compromise."

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if authorship credit is given to Calle Zorro and a link to MoreSexForMen.com is included with it:

What's at the Root of Your Marriage Problems? by Jake Jafims

All relationships run into problems from time to time. You could fill an entire book if you tried to list every possible problem. As soon as you finished someone would come up with more problems to add.

There are as many relationship problems as there are relationships. We're all unique and what one person would view as a problem, someone else might find helpful. It will come as no surprise then, that there isn't one root cause for all marriage problems.

Since you're unique, any problems you are experiencing may have a unique root cause or causes. It can be difficult to discover the root causes but it is possible with determination and teamwork. The first step is to sit down with your spouse and have a conversation.

The goal of this first conversation is to bring up your concerns and to narrow down the possible areas that may be at the root of your relationship problems. Surprisingly, it is not uncommon for one partner to be completely unaware that the other partner feels that there is a problem.

Most marriage counselors agree that the three biggest root causes of marital problems are money, sex and children. If you and your spouse can come to an understanding on these three issues then you've gone a long way toward a successful marriage.

Any of the "big 3" issues can destroy a marriage if the two of you can't come reach an agreement on them. Lets assume that you and your spouse have resolved any issues surrounding the three most common problem areas. We now need to look at a couple of the less common root causes.

Trust, or more specifically, the lack of trust is often a problem. This issue is more common in newer marriages. But suspicions can work their way into any marriage. It is time to sit down and have a talk about trust if you feel that your partner isn't being completely honest. Be prepared to discuss specific events that have made you question your trust.

Being trustworthy requires a commitment on both parties to always be fair, truthful, and consistent and do what you say you will do. It also means being sensitive, respectful and acting as a good listener.

Compatibility may be at the root of your relationship problems. Compatibility issues don't usually show up for years. As life marches on, we all change. Early in your relationship you may have had many common interests. Perhaps you were both into dancing, skiing or NASCAR. Now you find that your interests have drifted apart.

There are many more possible root causes for marital problems. Finding the root cause is a very important step in the process. But it is only the first step. Once you have found the root problem it is time to begin working on the solution.

There are many avenues open to you in your quest to repair your marriage. Marriage counseling is a good choice if you and your spouse can't find the root cause. There is also a lot of great marriage advice available in book and in online products.

Sanctity Of Marriage

What do we mean by the word “sanctity” it means, “the quality of being sacred or holy. The sacredness of marriage should be revered as a cru...