Monday, August 31, 2009

Marriage - 4 Things That Women Should Accomplish Before Saying "I Do"

It all starts with taking the L.E.A.P (four steps to happiness).

Lifestyle
Earnings
Alone time
Passion

Fact -

By now we all know that 40-50% of marriages ends in divorce, but let's explore that even further. I bet many of you were not even aware that a whopping 36 to 39% of that percentage belongs to women and men under the age of 25. The plot thickens.

The Myths -

In today's world, women are more independent than ever; however, many of us are still haunted by the myths "happily-ever-after" and "love can conquer all", which play a major part in the high divorce rates. Let's face it, many women still long for the fairytale ending of some handsome Prince sweeping them off their feet...taking them away from all problems, completing them, and on and on. This only works in the movies. In real life, after the honeymoon stage, everyday life starts to pay a visit-and often.

The Culprit -
The truth of the matter is these are some of the real culprits that threaten your happy ending:

* Finances
* Sex
* Communication
* Family
* Religion
* Resentment

Many relationships are doomed to fail before they even begin because they are started under such false pretenses. There are no guarantees, but if you're thinking of getting married at some point in your life and want to increase the odds of happiness, take that L.E.A.P. These four simple must do's (as I like to call it), prepares you for whatever's to, come by starting with the one in the mirror, you!

L-is for Lifestyle
First take inventory of the life you currently live and the kind you see yourself living in the future. You may lead a quiet, laid-back, walks-along-the-beach type of life or you may like the excitement of concerts, parties etc. You may be quite the traveler; can't stay put for long periods of time. Are you a vegan, religious, or a neat freak? Do you live lavishly, accepting only the finer things that life has to offer? You get the idea. Compatibility is a major aspect of a relationship. Learn your lifestyle.

E- is for Earning
Get your finances in order. Money's not everything, but let's be real honest-when things go wrong in a relationship, there's nothing happy about being broke and alone with no plans. Set your income goals and go for it -full speed. Make sure you have a checking and savings account. Some of you may have mutual funds, stocks and bonds, even a 401k. Are you in debt? Take a look at your credit reports. See where you stand on paper and take the proper steps to improve your score. Don't wait until you get into a relationship to do these things, because love has a way of distracting us, especially women. Go in solid or close to it.

A-is for Alone
This one may seem obvious, but few of us truly get this. Spend some alone time with, that's right, you. Fall in love with you first before loving someone else. Ask yourself, "Who am I"? Figure out what truly makes you happy. Do you have trust, commitment, or jealousy issues? Are you religious or are you spiritual? If you don't deal with these issues now, they will surface once you're married, promise.

P-is for Passion
Last, but probably the most important of the four. Follow your dreams. Never and I mean never give up on your dreams. Take every single step towards that dream. Focus on you before you focus on someone else. If you do it the other way around, 9 times out of ten, you'll end up putting your life on hold. Find that career and do what it takes to achieve it and thrive.

So enclosing my friends, remember-although nothings guaranteed and no rule is set in stone, one thing's for sure-no one can give you happiness, you must supply yourself with a plethora of it...then there will be plenty to go around.

R. Phillips

Motivator for Independent Women.Go through this link to know more



Article Source:Visit this link for that

Make Your Husband Fall in Love With You Again

A lot of married women have a common overriding concern - how do they make their husbands fall in love with them again? After years of being married the romance can dry out and sometimes that can spell trouble. When feelings change, it opens the marriage to all sorts of insecurities and worries... Will he leave me for someone else? Does he not find me attractive anymore? Why can't we have fun the way we used to? How can we rekindle the romance? These are some concerns that give many women sleepless nights.

It's not a good feeling when you realize that your husband's feelings towards you might've changed. And you wonder if you should leave things as they are and watch your marriage move towards a slow and painful death or is there something you can do to save it? Well, the good news is, you can make your husband fall in love with you again and put your marriage back on solid ground. Here are some effective tips to make your man sit up and take notice of you:

• Don't make the mistake of focusing on figuring out what exactly went wrong and why? Instead of worrying or concentrating on the negatives, focus on positive solutions.

• If you continue to focus on what could've made your husband fall out of love with you, you'll be filled with regret. As of today, regard this as the beginning of a new and satisfying phase of your marriage. Wake up everyday with this positive attitude.

• Your husband is bound to notice a change in your behavior and might get inspired by it! When you reach out to him and show him how much you love him and value his being an integral part of your life, his attitude will also change.

• Don't forget to be the best you can be. When you look in the mirror concentrate on the good features of your face, don't look at your acne or crooked nose or whatever! Do good and feel good. Work on yourself within and without. Look after your appearance. These things should make your husband fall in love with you again.

• Cultivate and follow your dreams. Do things you've always wanted to, but didn't or couldn't for whatever reason. A spouse with their own set of interests makes for an attractive and confident partner, someone who has new aspects to talk about and share.

• Learn to have fun again as a couple. Don't get over serious about life - the kids, bills to pay, money to earn. Sure, you need to do all of that and they are extremely important, but don't let them take over your life completely. Have moments of spontaneous fun! Do it consciously and you both will feel good! Go for an ice cream in the middle of the night. Go shake a leg or two at a night club!

• In order for someone to love you, you need to love yourself. When you love yourself, you have more to give. And when you treat yourself well, your husband will remember how lucky he is to have you in his life.

Try out these highly effective tips and notice the positive changes they bring about in your marriage and partner. This is how you make your husband fall in love with you again! All the best!

Why is getting your husband back so important to you?

Because a good relationship is one of the most treasured of human interactions. We all want to be loved. There are the great times together, the shared dreams and visions, the mutual likes and dislikes and more. Great relationships are essential for enjoying a good quality of life. They color everything else around us.

Losing a lover is one of the most emotionally traumatizing episodes in our life. Losing a spouse is even worse. It is amazing how the very thing that brings us the most pleasure also brings with it the most grief.

But don't give up on the love of your life yet. It is too early for this. You can still reverse the breakup and successfully reunite with your spouse. I will teach you how to bring back the passion into your relationship.

Please visit my site: to find out how you can get your husband back in your life and make him fall in love with you again. These methods have been used by many with an extraordinary degree of success. You will be in good hands.

Article Source:Follow this link

How Best To Show Love To Your Spouse

Love your spouse - the Secret Of love in marriage. Love is blind and it wins all. Love is a wonderful gift from God, it makes one feel special and multiplies joy, it is kind, thoughtful and adds spice to life. You might be wondering how this works out, it is simply by falling deeply in love again with your spouse. The question is how? It might be lingering in your mind. I wonder where the first love goes after marriage. Have you ever flashed back how life used to be when you were newly married? With all the sweet words and wonderful treatment, love was at its climax. How you used to hold her like a baby, call her sweet names such as sweet heart, baby, honey and so on. Now the fire of love died out and the spark that used to ignite you is dead. True love remains forever green, it does not grow weary because it takes no effort, it doesn't grow old because it knows no conditions, it cares, bears and goes on and on. So, if you truly meant what you used to do, love your spouse.

Why can't you rekindle your love flame and love your spouse? Love ends when you stop caring and sharing. Allocate time for your spouse without interruptions of any activities. Take holiday outings together and get time to share views and opinions that would keep your moves better and improve your love life. To show love to your spouse, you may do extra-ordinary things that would re-ignite the love that you had towards your spouse. Spoil your spouse by surprising her with such gifts that you used to offer during courtship. You may also call him/her such names that you used during your early days in marriage. To ladies, where did you take the attention that you used to give your husband before you got kids? All the attention was driven off to your kids. It is a high time you draw back that attention to him and love your spouse.

Widen your vision, develop a healthy self image and find strength in adversity within your spouse. Refresh the good old memories that used to re-light and sets power in appreciation. Learn to appreciate every single thing that your spouse does to you even though small. Courtesy costs nothing but means a lot, learn to use such words as please, sorry and excuse when addressing your spouse. Learn to love your spouse under all conditions regardless of the hardships and the mountains and valleys you might be crossing together.

Take your spouse to such places that you used to go when in courtship such as cinemas and dancing halls. Do crazy things that you used to do while young in love such as kissing, dancing together, playing and so on. By doing this you will be strengthening the bond of love that
is between you and you will be showing your spouse how much you love him/her. Rekindle your love flame and love your spouse once more.

Francis K. Githinji Is An Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project Love Your Spouse Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At Love Your Spouse

Article Source:Don't fail to visit this link

Loving Your Spouse With Wisdom

There are two ways we can love our spouse. We can love under our own understanding of what we think love is, or we can love the way God has directed us to love. I think we all know how to love, but doing it is a whole different matter.

What is the difference between the two? The first way of loving is a condition and learned way to love, which is selfish and self-seeking. We don't know we are behaving selfishly because we do not know any other way to love.

The second way of loving is what comes naturally because we have loved and accepted God into our lives first. The reason it's so natural is because we have recognized and utilized the spiritual Christ in our lives, which makes loving a natural process of who we are.

It is very difficult to love another if we are only thinking about ourselves. Some examples of how we love our spouse selfishly are, committing adultery, being disrespectful, using controlling behavior, using negative feelings, becoming resentful, becoming ensnared in an addiction, and the list goes on.

False teachings on marriage and loose morals in society have caused many couples to become bitter and apprehensive when loving one another. Society has lost the value of what real love is and it has tainted couples into sinful behavior. As we all know sin dampens our love for God by turning our focus on ourselves. You cannot truly love your spouse if you only think of yourself.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church without stain, or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. Ephesians 5:25-28

1. A Husband should be willing to sacrifice everything for his wife just as Jesus Christ sacrificed everything for us. Do you think a husband who loves God will be able to make his wife the most important aspect of his life?

2. A Husband should make his wife's well-being of prime importance. Do you think that if a man accepts Christ into his life he will know how to love, protect, provide and care for his wife properly? God will give him the answers he needs.

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Ephesians 5:22-24

As you can see from scripture, both husband and wife are called to submit. For the wife, this means willingly following her husband's leadership in Christ. For the husband, it means putting aside his own interests in order to care for his wife properly. This means doing whatever it takes to protect, provide, love, and care for his wife under the "spiritual authority" given to him by God.

If a husband does not accept the "spiritual authority" of God, then he has no justification to think that his wife submit to him the way God intends for a woman to submit to her husband. Obviously they are not basing their love under the foundations of Jesus Christ, but under their own understanding of what they think love is, and this scripture, therefore, does not apply to them.

Here is what couples usually tell me when they are going through difficulties in their marriage. They want to do what is right for their marriage. They are willing to work at the marriage but don't know what to do about their problems. Their negative feelings bring them down, and they are usually upset and furious over the iniquities and faults of one another.

The problem is couples are basing their marriage upon worldly views, attitudes, and thoughts, and the fact is, as long as they continue to do so, they will continue to have difficulties loving their spouse properly. When we are not motivated by love, we become critical of our spouse. We stop looking for the good things in those we love and only see their faults.

We can all talk about how to love and we know what the bible says about loving our spouse, but what about doing what it says! Bottom line is real love takes effort, and if the willingness is not there to work on marriage and to love our spouse with the love that comes natural, couples will have problems.

The good news is you can love your spouse naturally and wholly by recognizing and utilizing the foundations of God's design into your relationship and working off of that for your marriage.

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Romans 12:9-13

Angie Lewis is the author of two marriage books. "Journey on the Roads Less Traveled", a book about love, life, addiction, and marriage.

"Love The Man Your Married. This book tackles areas in marriage that couples need to know and understand and apply for a successful marriage. This book is a most reliable resource for married couples, from infidelity issues to complete forgiveness.

For more information on these books visit Angie's website and sign up for the free monthly newsletter while you're there! Get yours by clicking this link :

Article Source:Check it out here:

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Can I Save My Marriage? Try to Spice Up Your Sex Life.By Lanny A Ward

Whenever they feel that their marriage has reached an all time low or is in severe danger of doing so, many martial partners will raise the question: "can I save my marriage?" The answer is both yes and no, because if the relationship is not working out (for whatever reason) and only one spouse is making all of the effort, then the relationship will not get terribly far. A marriage has to be a relationship which prizes honesty, commitment, loyalty and trust between both spouses and where both spouses are made to feel valued and appreciated. An unequal partnership is an unhealthy relationship and whilst it may function for a while in the short-term it will eventually falter and then die a death in the long term.

However that said, it maybe that one of the spouses has to take that all essential first step towards making progress and so they may want to try and initiate the new regime of change. The same problems and issues plague marriages across the world and irrespective of length, or culture and thankfully the solutions are equally universal.

If you feel that sex is the issue (whether this is due to the lack of it or the "quality" of it) then focus on this. It is important that the spouses appreciate that males and females regard sexuality in different ways and there will be different aspects of it that they will value over the others. Men for example, tend to be rather visual creatures who prefer overt and prominent displays of sexuality and femininity. Ladies, why not surprise (and treat!) your husband to some new lingerie? Bring him his dinner in it, and watch his eyes pop out of his head in a heady combination of lust, desire, surprise and delight!

Nothing excites a man quite so much than fellatio (oral sex) and again the principle of conspicuousness outlined in the above paragraph is equally applicable. Make sure you wear a very bright lipstick be it red or pink to accentuate your mouth, groan and moan whilst performing it and make sure to compliment him on his size/taste/whatever.

As pleasant as fellatio is and can be, one of the surest ways to excite your man is to make eye contact with him during it. There is nothing quite so delicious or erotic in this world than to have a female adoring your penis with a look of submission and devotion in her eyes.

3 Easy Ways to Last Longer in Bed and Give Her Multiple EXPLOSIVE Orgasms (Very Powerful!).By Evan Kinney

Do you notice that just after 15 minutes of sex (or even less), you already reach your limit and climax? Do you even notice your partner having her own orgasm with you? And when she says it doesn't really matter if she doesn't orgasm, don't take her word for it - you could be in real trouble! You really have to work on bringing her to a climax each time you have sex. Follow these 3 simple tips to increase your stamina, and even outlast her!

#1 - Diversify your styles: Even if sex feels so amazing for you, do not stick with one position when making love to her. When you are feeling so good, change your position so you reduce your own stimulation. Try to do this naturally so it would not feel awkward and just feel like a continuation of your making love. Keep at it and do not stop so her pleasure builds even as you keep yours down.

#2 - Give yourself some Love before giving her some too! Masturbate first if you know you will be having sex with your lady today. By spending all that energy and having your penis lose some of its stored sperm, you decrease the chances of you to have a premature ejaculation. This will make sure you would be able to hold your penis up longer.

#3 - Do not let yourself be over stimulated: Limiting the sensation of your penis with a condom would ensure that you are able to have sex with your partner longer. Try those thick condoms that are on sale. If you cannot find any, wear two condoms. It will be very difficult if you're just controlling your penis to hold your climax. You cannot even tell what might happen during sex, so it is definitely better to be safe than sorry!

The 7 Christian Sex Laws For Better Sex In Marriage.By Jacob Thomas

The amount of sexual, romantic, and intimate satisfaction you expect from your marriage is largely affected by your ability to constantly and consistently reinforce the reasons why you and your lover chose to wed. I promise you can enjoy giving and receiving better sex with hyper satisfaction so long as you are willing to do three things:

1. Pray with God and each other

2. Take the time to uncover and workout the 'little-meaningless-issues' in your marriage that turn into big disagreements.

3. Continue to always want/ask for an increase in the intimacy department of your marriage.

In addition to these three things though, I have a set of rules - Jacob's Sex Laws that I recommend to Christian couples who want to improve the intimacy in their marriage.


Be there.
Use your mind.
Use props.
Take your time.
Get Feedback.
Use everything.
Always care outside.

Be There
One of the biggest factors of great sexual chemistry that's overlooked is being unattached to what's going on. It doesn't matter whether you are on the giving end or receiving end of sex; it's important to stay focused and be there. Have you ever heard the saying of 'physically here, mentally somewhere else'? Some days you may have to work hard to keep from getting distracted. The bills will still get paid and Johnny will do his homework on time, so for the moment - just relax and enjoy the moment.

Use your mind
Just because you may be in the habit of physically going through the motions of sex does not mean that's the way it's supposed to be. The best kind of sex is always an emotional journey like a 747 airplane's gradual climb to the top of the clouded blue lit sky and a comfortable descent in paradise. Use your mind to think of new positions, things to say, different ways to say it, different ways to kiss, a great sex story can always add extra excitement to the night.

Use Props
You don't always have to be in the bed to have sex. The slightest change in your sex location can make a huge difference in interest, desire, and arousal. Far too often the bed is used as the main center of attraction for sex.

Take your time
One of the biggest romance and intimacy killers of all time is the refusal to actively engage in foreplay. After dinner sit at the table and talk, talk about things you don't normally talk about and ask questions that will arouse your spouse. Be flirtatious in a way that is irresistible and tease your spouse to no end. The next move to make is to kiss, fondle, and undress - but slooooooooooowwww down. Some nights it will be better to take one article of clothing off at a time (with music on in the background and your 'sexy' face) than to lay there and just wait for it.

Get Feedback
Is there anything I can do better? Is there anything I do that totally annoys you? Every now and then a sex survey is necessary for both your benefit and your spouse's. Maybe you'll find out that he likes to have the lights on so he can watch the action. Or maybe you'll find out that she likes to have her hair stroked and be hugged tightly. Most sex experts do not mention the importance of a feedback loop but it is important in your marriage considering how feelings, moods, attitudes can change over time.

Use everything
Being able to multi-task/touch is the name of the game and will work miracles you never thought were possible. I would like to say think of yourself like an octopus if I may do so, but in that light - if you can rub her feet while kissing in the missionary position you will create a huge surge of arousal by hitting those erotic zones. As a wife - if you can rub oil on his chest while straddling him and telling him your fantasies, you will drive your husband insane...to the moon and back.

Always care outside
The factor that we drive home the most and always stress is that sex does not start in the bedroom; it never has and never will - and the sooner you can grasp this concept is the sooner you ensure you will always enjoy great sex. You see, thinking about each other and being happy with each other outside of the bedroom is the key to having outrageously exciting sex. Being able to hold hands, kiss, laugh, share ideas, and secrets is what fuels the fire....sex is just the way to put it out.

Always remember and know that your marriage is extremely valuable and the intimacy you share with your spouse is another way of making it stronger

Sanctity Of Marriage

What do we mean by the word “sanctity” it means, “the quality of being sacred or holy. The sacredness of marriage should be revered as a cru...