Wednesday, April 22, 2009

What Is Tantric Sex Really All About?

Is Tantric Sex simply a technique for making sex last longer? Is it a technique to make orgasm more pleasurable, longer and more intense? Or is it something far greater which most people cannot even begin to conceptualize?

For the ordinary individual the idea of an orgasm that can fill your entire body and go on in pulsating bursts for hours on end sounds totally preposterous! But what if this is exactly what Tantric Sex can lead to? What if the orgasm we have all experienced is simply the release of a tiny amount of sexual energy into the genital area which stimulates the many nerve endings located there, thus giving us a pleasurable sensation? What if sexual energy could be controlled and circulated throughout the body to stimulate all nerve endings and thus cause an orgasm that fills the entire body?

Did you know that 40% of your daily energy goes into the production of sperm or eggs. When a man ejaculates he loses an enormous amount of energy and usually becomes tired as a consequence. For a female it is menstruation that leads to a loss of sexual energy but for both the consequences are the same. A huge amount of highly charged sexual energy is lost which could have been used for greater health and pleasure.

What if you could stop the loss of sexual energy and thus build it, cultivate it and circulate it throughout your body? Does it not make sense that with so much more energy to use your physical body would become stronger and healthier? Does it not also make sense that with more energy you will be able to have much more sex, for much longer periods and with greater pleasure? Well this is exactly what does happen and it can lead to full body orgasms that you could not even begin to imagine!

Another aspect of the cultivation of sexual energy is that it puts pressure on your emotions. During a woman’s cycle she builds up sexual energy which gets to a peak just before menstruation where the energy is evacuated with the eggs and uterine lining. At this point she may become very emotional and may even feel physical pain from the built up energy. Once it is released she is suddenly relaxed again and her husband can also relax! When a man has not ejaculated for a while he may become agitated, obsessed with thoughts of sex and be unable to concentrate. He may also become more emotional. His testicles will become swollen and he will feel physical pain due to the build up in energy. When it is released he feels immediate relief and can think straight again.

If someone was to begin cultivating their sexual energy they would inevitably be confronted by emotions which the extra energy is putting pressure on. If they instead of releasing the energy, continue to cultivate it these emotions will be brought to the foreground of consciousness until they are cleared or changed. In this way the person’s emotional energy is actually transformed through the cultivation of sexual energy and they may become free of emotional issues. This is very important to understand because it is emotional issues which prevent sexual energy from flowing throughout the body in the first place. Emotional issues cause blockages in the flow of energy and therefore prevent the flow of sexual energy during sex. Due to this people’s sexual energy is trapped in their genitals where it cannot be cultivated. The genitals can hold only so much energy before they must release it. Therefore you cannot cultivate sexual energy without also unblocking the paths for it to travel into the body.

The possibilities of pleasure are truly infinite but it involves a process of clearing! Tantric sex is not just about having better sex. It is about an actual transformation of energy which frees you from past conditioning and opens you up to experiences of a higher nature. Only with clear energy channels can sexual energy flow freely throughout the body and lead to true ectasy.

Four Reasons Why it Isn’t Time to Have Sex Yet

I can tell you one thing for certain : in life, timing is everything. Just like everything else, sexual activity is as much about when you do it is as it is how you do it. So, with this in mind, I’ve written up this short checklist as a reminder of some of the reasons why you should hold off on sex for at least the short-term. When you’re in the moment with your partner, there are probably emotions and hormones firing at full cylinder, but if you keep these things in mind I assure you that you will be guaranteeing yourself a better sexual relationship.

1. The most obvious reason is probably the most overlooked : make sure that you want to have sex and that you’re mentally prepared for a sexual relationship with this person. During foreplay with someone new, your hormones and emotions will be riding an awesome rollercoaster. It’s something new and exciting and you’re eager to explore a relationship with this person. But make sure you are emotionally and sexually ready before you dive in to the relationship. There’s nothing wrong with holding off on sex for a while until you’re completely sure that you’re ready. Your partner won’t mind, and in the long run, you’ll both be better off for it because the sex will be that much better. You’ll be confident and in control, and having these things makes for a much more fun sexual experience.

2. Your partner is giving you the impression that they’re not ready yet. Communication is probably the most important thing for a couple to perfect. As a relationship develops, you will be much better off if you learn early on how to communicate with your partner and sense their desires and needs. So while your partner may not say something outright, you should be very aware of their body language and actions during foreplay to make sure that they’re ready for intercourse. There’s nothing wrong with talking during foreplay, either. Communication is sexy and can be a great way for you two to bond while you’re learning more about each other. If you get the sense that your partner is tensing up or overly nervous, take the time to make sure the moment is right for both of you, and you’re sure to have a better experience.

3. You haven’t discussed safe sex yet with your partner. This is essential and can often be overlooked, leading to big time regrets later. If you don’t know the person that well or if you’re just getting to know them, you need to know something about their sexual history before you proceed with any sort of sexual activity. Has the person had unprotected sex in the past? How many partners have they had recently? Have they been checked for STI’s and HIV? Undoubtedly it takes some thought to ask these questions just the right way without killing the mood, but I assure you it’s possible and when done right, makes you look smart and responsible, things that your partner should be excited about. Also, discuss what safe sex options are on the table for you two. Don’t assume someone has the birth control taken care of without asking first.

4. Neither of you have a condom. You probably should have seen this one coming. While the need for safe sex should always be in the back of your mind, it’s very easy to throw that thought out the window in the heat of the moment. But at those times it is more essential than ever to make sure that you engage in protected and safe sex. While it may be very hard to put off having sex until one of you goes to buy protection, in the long run it is worth your while to make sure that your relationship is based on the idea of mutual respect and trust. Mutual respect and trust is best developed when both partners take care to protect each other from STI’s, HIV and unwanted pregnancy. So step back for a minute from the situation, remember what’s most important and make sure to wait until you can practice safe sex.

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Steamy Sex Secrets He Wants You To Know

Men are full of surprises. And bedroom behaviour is no exception. Men have their secrets and they want their wives to know them. It's true that all men have sex secrets. Not the darm sultry secrets of an affair, but a restraint in sharing some cravings or the details of his day-to-day thoughts and actions with his wife - inside and out of the marriage. He may not reveal romance strategies or feelings of vulnerability or shame. These are thtings that men may have learned, over time, to keep to themselves. Because a man does not always openly express his emotions, women too often feel that his 'unavailability' is intentional, that his silence is an unwillingness to open up. Men are actually full of thoughts and feelings, but unable to meet the standards that too many put on them to openly communicate them. So, what powerful facts about themselves do all men want to share with their spouses? Here are eight sex secrets that may help you understand - and get even closer to - your man.

He wants you to dress up for him:

A long, long time ago, your husband bought you some lingerie. Remember? You wore it once or twice, then stuffed it deep in the back of a drawer. Well, the time has come to dig it out. Consider dressing for his tastes and not just yours once in a while. When you dress for him, he takes it as a sign that you still care enough to make the effort. Men are visual creatures and get a lot of sexual mileage out of what they see. So, some sexy lingerie will go a long way to rekindle the passion you share. Surprise him by slipping into something he will find exciting. And, there is something about lace, ribbons, feathers, or not-so-subtle sheer material that drives a man wild. And honestly, who can blame him? Plus, when you indulge in sexy lingerie, do not get too hung up about your appearance or stretch marks. Movies and fashion magazines may make women feel they must have taut tummies and look model-perfect, but men say they appreciate real women with foibles and imperfections. And personality counts! Your insecurity will rob you and your husband of precious moments together. So, when your husband says you look beautiful and sexy just the way you are, believe him. Dust off the lingerie and fire up the candles.

He wants you to initiate lovemaking:

If your husband is always the one to start things up, eventually he'll wonder, 'Why doesn't she ever initiate lovemaking? Doesn't she want me anymore? A man wants nothing more than to know he's sexually desirable to you - that you want him like crazy. Guys chronically complain that they always have to initiate sex. When you take the lead, you're explicitly telling him that you love to spend time with him - it immediately eliminates the guesswork for your guy. What's more, when you approach him, you're in the driver's seat. Too many women let men call the sexual shots between the sheets. Being the initiator gives you an opportunity to set the tone and the pace.

He craves for sexual affirmation:

Men have insecurities too. They may never tell anyone this, but they are secretly vulnerable. How does a woman help change the insecurity to confidence? Affirmation and compliments! To men, affirmation from their wives means everything! So, be explicit in letting yoUr husband know what you enjoy. Men, love those kind of directions. It's affirming for a man to know that you think he's a great lover. When men receive regular and genuine positive attention and compliments from their wives, they tend to become much more secure and confident in all areas of their lives.

He wants to be your hero:

What part of a man most enjoys being stroked? Answer: His ego! Show your man that you really need him. Men, just like women, simply need to be wanted. Regular, fulfilling sex is critical to a man's sense of feeling loved and desired. Plus, remember to compliment your spouse on being a great husband. It's a quick shortcut to making him feel wanted, needed and loved. And this positive reinforcement of your husband's good behaviour will yield big dividends later, as he subconsciously tries to live up to your glowing appraisal. Here's another secret: Pamper him sometimes. You can set a day to give him a massage, set up a hot bath, etc. What makes such royal treatment so romantic to a man is the way it reassures him that you appreciate him and that you're proud of him. Many women today don't realise how vulnerable men are and how much they need love too.

He wants passionate lovemaking:

Men love passionate women. Men want to be desired and loved. Letting them know that you're passionate about them will turn them on every time and pave the way for great lovemaking. Women who are great lovers put energy in from start to finish. Plus, displaying tons of enthusiasm encourages your man to bring you to new heights. The more you get into it, the harder he'll work to please you.

He loves unexpected touches:

Yes, it's true. The slightest touch from you can bring a man to his knees mid-sentence. In other words, let your fingers do the talking. Even those quick bicep rubs when your man gets back from the gym, or those errant shoulder squeezes, can send your man over the moon. While coffee is pretty good, your gentle peck is really the best part of waking up. It's as if out of the blue, you were so overcome by his breathtaking cuteness that you just had to give him a cuddle. And men adore your tender touch in the bedroom as well. Because contrary to popular belief, guys aren't just looking for fast-track orgasmic manoeuvres in the dark. They want and need intimacy, touch and passion too..

He wants novelty:

Once a couple has been together for a while, they often develop a sexual routine. It's not always a negative thing as it is usually mutually satisfying. So what's the problem? There could be a new technique that one or both of you like but haven't discovered yet. What to do? Mix things up a bit. If the bedroom is your primary lovemaking venue, why not steam things up in the shower? "And it's worth adding some variety to the old 'he does that, then you do this' choreography. Swap things around or throw a new position into the mix. Make sure monogamy and monotony don't become synonymous. The trick for a married couple is to maintain a degree of novelty, by providing variety in activity, location and type of stimulation. Many men find that experimenting with positions, styles and acts takes on a new importance as they age. They say that variation not only keeps them aroused, but it satisfies different cravings. Better sex isn't necessarily wilder sex, after all. There are things you can do to spice up sex once in a while.

He is excited by your sexual intensity and assertiveness:

When you openly tell him what you desire and what feels good, you instantly put yourself into an active role as opposed to a responsive one. Verbal feedback is crucial to your pleasure. It helps to develop your own sexual language. Some women can't talk dirty. And that's okay. You should try to find a new way to let your husband know what feels great in a way that's comfortable for you. It might be words, it might be moans, but figure out how to let him know you're loving every minute of it or at least which minutes you're loving.

Choosing The Right Sex Lubricants

The very nature of sex requires two bodies to meet in a potentially friction restricted way. This is where sex lubricants are used to reduce friction and enhance pleasure.

What are Sex Lubricants

Sex lubricants, sometimes referred to as personal lubricants are specially designed lubricants for use during sexual activities. In a similar manner to conventional lubricants sex lubricants are designed to eliminate friction between two surfaces. All modern sex lubricants have evolved from surgical lubricants such as KY Cream that were widely used during vaginal or anal examinations to facilitate access for the surgeon and reduce discomfort for the patient. Although designed primarily as a surgical lubricant KY quickly became recognized as a great lubricant when engaging in sexual practices. In recent years a number of companies developed and marketed a range of products specifically designed to be used as sex lubricants.

Water Based Sex Lubricants

Water based lubricants are water soluble and are generally considered to be the type that is least likely to lead to skin irritation. Early water based lubes were cellulose based products but further developments has seen the addition of various agent to improve the Lubricants performance. These agents improve spreading properties and resistance to contamination.
One problem with earlier water based lubricants was their tendency to dry up during use, fortunately adding a small amount of water reactivates them. More advanced products contain dimethicone that prolongs the lubricating properties and reduces drying up.

Please note that water based lubricants are not compatible with sex practices that occur in water, as such if you enjoy sex in the bath these products are not right for you.

Oil Based Sex Lubricants

Oil based lubricants aren't widely used nowadays due to a number of problems. Unlike water based lubricants oil products weaken latex and can subsequently weaken latex condoms. Additionally oil based lubricants have a tendency to coat and stick to surfaces for prolonged periods providing a breeding ground for bacteria that can later lead to infection. As such it is generally accepted that oil based lubricants are not safe for vaginal sex and should only be used for anal sex where it is known that both parties are free from STD's.

To conclude oil based products such as Vaseline and baby oil may be easily available and relative cheap but the associated medical risks far outweigh any financial benefit.

Silicone Based Lubricants

The hydrophobic nature of silicone base lubricants technically makes them oil based. However most have been specially designed to be chemically compatible with latex condoms. The advantage of silicone sex lubricants is that they remain slippery for longer periods, the disadvantage however is that they cannot be used with silicone sex toys.

Uses of Sex Lubricants

Whilst historically medical lubricants such as Ky Jelly were used to assist during medical procedures such as gynaecological and rectal examinations modern sex lubricants are specifically designed to increase pleasure of sexual practices. The lubricants can be applied to either the penis or sex toys to aid penetration during vaginal intercourse. Particularly applicable to women that experience vaginal dryness or contraction. Lubricants are also used to increase the pleasure of anal sex, simplifying entry and increasing pleasure for both parties.

Choose wisely and you are sure to enhance your enjoyment of sex.

Controversial Same Sex Marriage

When you stroll at the park, go to the mall, have a picnic, go to church or stay at some place, you sometimes see couples of the same sex who look like they feel so proud to tell the world that they are indeed a couple and that they love each other. Opinions regarding same gender relationships, which sometimes result to same-sex marriage, vary with people of different countries and cultures. In some countries, same-sex marriage is a socially, religiously and lawfully recognized marriage of two people of the same sex live together as a family. Many countries on the other hand still do not permit this type of marriage.

It was said that in early Greece, this type of marriage was being practiced. The Greek men and youths who are in their mid-teens or sometimes as early as the age of seven shared a pederastic relationship where a paternal consent from the youth is necessary. This type of relationship was analogous to marriage where there are social and religious responsibilities observed by the couple and it also has its sexual aspect. In ancient Rome, it was told that even Emperor Nero was married to two other men in different times. When Europe was Christianized, this type of marriage was rejected by the Church and the State and it was banned in many countries.

It was reported that the first same-sex union recognized by the government took place in Denmark in 1989. Currently, Canada, South Africa, Netherlands, Belgium Spain, and the U.S. states of Massachusetts, Rhode Island and New Mexico allow full marriage to same gender couples.

Nowadays, where marriage is claimed to have undergone significant changes, same-sex marriage still remains one of the controversial topics in the society. There are a lot of religious and social arguments about it. These arguments have their own reasons where some people would agree and disagree. It seems that for couples who wish to be married under this type of marriage, it is only a matter of choosing where the ceremony will take place.