Monday, August 31, 2009

Marriage - 4 Things That Women Should Accomplish Before Saying "I Do"

It all starts with taking the L.E.A.P (four steps to happiness).

Lifestyle
Earnings
Alone time
Passion

Fact -

By now we all know that 40-50% of marriages ends in divorce, but let's explore that even further. I bet many of you were not even aware that a whopping 36 to 39% of that percentage belongs to women and men under the age of 25. The plot thickens.

The Myths -

In today's world, women are more independent than ever; however, many of us are still haunted by the myths "happily-ever-after" and "love can conquer all", which play a major part in the high divorce rates. Let's face it, many women still long for the fairytale ending of some handsome Prince sweeping them off their feet...taking them away from all problems, completing them, and on and on. This only works in the movies. In real life, after the honeymoon stage, everyday life starts to pay a visit-and often.

The Culprit -
The truth of the matter is these are some of the real culprits that threaten your happy ending:

* Finances
* Sex
* Communication
* Family
* Religion
* Resentment

Many relationships are doomed to fail before they even begin because they are started under such false pretenses. There are no guarantees, but if you're thinking of getting married at some point in your life and want to increase the odds of happiness, take that L.E.A.P. These four simple must do's (as I like to call it), prepares you for whatever's to, come by starting with the one in the mirror, you!

L-is for Lifestyle
First take inventory of the life you currently live and the kind you see yourself living in the future. You may lead a quiet, laid-back, walks-along-the-beach type of life or you may like the excitement of concerts, parties etc. You may be quite the traveler; can't stay put for long periods of time. Are you a vegan, religious, or a neat freak? Do you live lavishly, accepting only the finer things that life has to offer? You get the idea. Compatibility is a major aspect of a relationship. Learn your lifestyle.

E- is for Earning
Get your finances in order. Money's not everything, but let's be real honest-when things go wrong in a relationship, there's nothing happy about being broke and alone with no plans. Set your income goals and go for it -full speed. Make sure you have a checking and savings account. Some of you may have mutual funds, stocks and bonds, even a 401k. Are you in debt? Take a look at your credit reports. See where you stand on paper and take the proper steps to improve your score. Don't wait until you get into a relationship to do these things, because love has a way of distracting us, especially women. Go in solid or close to it.

A-is for Alone
This one may seem obvious, but few of us truly get this. Spend some alone time with, that's right, you. Fall in love with you first before loving someone else. Ask yourself, "Who am I"? Figure out what truly makes you happy. Do you have trust, commitment, or jealousy issues? Are you religious or are you spiritual? If you don't deal with these issues now, they will surface once you're married, promise.

P-is for Passion
Last, but probably the most important of the four. Follow your dreams. Never and I mean never give up on your dreams. Take every single step towards that dream. Focus on you before you focus on someone else. If you do it the other way around, 9 times out of ten, you'll end up putting your life on hold. Find that career and do what it takes to achieve it and thrive.

So enclosing my friends, remember-although nothings guaranteed and no rule is set in stone, one thing's for sure-no one can give you happiness, you must supply yourself with a plethora of it...then there will be plenty to go around.

R. Phillips

Motivator for Independent Women.Go through this link to know more



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